I've found a mixed cd in my father's car! It came out of thin air, accompanied by another labeless Beatles mixed cd.

Music that sums me up before Perpich, consisting of this mix!

Radio - Alkaline Trio
32 Flavors - Ani Difranco
Sorry I am - Ani Difranco
San Dimas High School Football Rules - The Ataris
Lift Her Pull Her - Atmosphere
Brick - Ben Folds Five
It's oh-so-quiet - Bjork
Soco Amaretto Lime - Brand New
Let the Good Times Roll - The Cars
The Brilliant Dance - Dashboard Confessionals
Bitter Ending - Evergreen Terrace
This side of Brightness - Thursday


Who was I?!

How is it that I am never satisfied with my sense of fashion? I keep buying and buying and blogging and blogging and oh wait! I keep blogging. That's it. I keep blogging about fashion, therefore becoming disatisfied because little miss so and so has adopted a really new great style that I want! Recently, I have found out that I am hypoglycemic. I am basically so far away from being diabetic that it hurts! It's completely managable, and snacking is good! But I forget to eat most times. It takes 28 days to make/break a habit. Let's see if I can do this.

Reminders.

-Find a gym to join in Chicago
-Volunteer at the YWCA
-Contact Ashley before trip
-Contact Shannon before trip
-Get a one day pass to Cheetah Gym during stay
-Find a good farmer's market

Hate hate hate this.

It absolutely sucks fighting with a friend. The only advice that I could give to anyone on this subject is to be careful what you say, because it might take it's toll on the other person. Shiit.

Ufda.

Tonight was a semi-dramatic time. I ventured over to Michael's house after my Pizza Luce gathering with the high school crew (be sure to check missed connections for my mean post about the counterperson). Before I went over there, I gave Michael a phone call. You know it's always a good sign when you ask to come over and the other person responds with "I guess". It's similar to being punched in the gut with spikes or being shot in the eye with a bebe gun (I'm sure of it). Despite all of this, I went over to see him anyway. But I went over there with the intention of completely ending everything. No friendship. No fucking. No dating. No nothing. I had already come to terms with what was Michael and I. It was something wonderful before that it will never be now or again.

It would have been easy to just send everything that I had on my mind in an email. But I figured he was worth something to me before everything got fucked up. He woo'ed me in such a way, and he seemed to be someone who would go down in my book as "one of Ally's great loves". So I gave him the benefit of a face-to-face confrontation. I needed to be blunt with him about all of the times that he made me feel like shit. I also needed to tell him that toying with my emotions was a no-go. Riding at the tip of my tongue was the fact that he did everything so wrong in such a fashion that it made me not want to be his friend! But life isn't as simple as blurting out things that aren't easy to talk about. So I waited.

He kept talking at me about a new shirt that he bought. "Hey Ally, do you want to see my new shirt that I bought?" he said. "No, not really," I replied. I began to give up listening to what he had to say. I knew I was screwed when the Charlie Rose show came on with Neil Young because we had to sit through that entire thing before I could confront him. I was hoping for a commercial break, but no! Not a god damn one. After it was over, I hesitated again to confront him with everything I was feeling. Finally, it was like a big explosion when I told him. I was a bubble waiting to burst, and I knew he could feel it coming on. I finally came out with it. I told him exactly what I felt. I told him many things.

I concluded the night with leaving and saying, "I hope you know that this is the last time that I want to see you. We aren't friends". Let me tell you, that felt really great! I left on my scooter feeling liberated from a situation that was obviously weighing me down. I believe that when I was dating Kyle Drake that he gave me a wrinkle between my eyes because I had to glare and squint so much while dating him. Michael probably didn't help this at all, and now I look like a scary old woman! I am so glad that I removed myself from the situation.

He text messaged me, but I didn't respond. I won't give him that.

Goodbye, Michael. You weren't even that great.

Right now I am discussing the word "nutter" with my good friend Kyle via internet. Don't you think it's a disgusting word? It reminds me of nut butter, which is good but the word "nutter" seems like it would be a brand of nut butter that Jif would release.

Kyle lives over in Scotland! So far, far away.

Right now, I am also waiting for Margaret and Katharine to arrive. They were my old friends from high school. It's a mini reunion, though a few are missing from the picture.

The schmoe's that are in the yellow and black shirts to the far right weren't really my friends, hence the bundling of friends to the left.

My fabulous day at the beach with Alida has turned into a not so fabulous next day. I always believe that I will do alright without sunscreen. Aren't we supposed to learn from our mistakes? Now I am redder than ketchup and flinching everytime I move a muscle.

Michaelicious.

So Michael didn't die. Which is good, because if he did die I would probably find him and beat him up. Let it be known to all that if you die, Ally will probably come find you and beat your decrepide corpse until she finds your soul floating around somewhere to beat you up. And if you were cremated, then you are safe.

He simply lost his cellphone underneath his car seat. And I just recieved a call from him. Today will consist of true first tier suburb Edina spirit. Maybe going to the mall. Starbucks or Dunn Bros. Scooting around like we ain't no thang. I pretty much missed Michael the entire time he was gone in California.

Michael typically wears printed T-shirts (softer colours like beiges and dull whites). His style is influenced by the electronic music culture mixed with a slight indie rock feel and some sort of conservative edge. Fitted jeans and pants happen on him mostly. His shoes are always the most out of character with his style. They sometimes remind me of a skateboarder. His hair very swoopy, with a nice trimmed beard.

Bonnie "Prince" Billy once told a story about

When the sun welcomes us in and the earth's protective skin fails and peels back, face to chin then we start it all again

Aha! A list of everything and anything.

So I've taken it upon myself to start writing down a list of everything that I want to accomplish once I make my big move to Chicago. And because I know you all are interested, I'm going to put it on this thinger mahjig.

-Post in blog
-Make purses
-Buy a sewing machine
-paint room a cool colour
-volunteer at YMCA for a free gym membership
-buy a bike
-buy a train pass
-make dresses
-find two very different jobs
-volunteer at Food not Bombs
-Have clothing swaps
-art parties
-buy a cute winter coat
-buy a bed
-take an intense amount of pictures
-dumpster dive
-get health insurance
-thrift store shop alot
-get active in sexual health organizations
-paint!!!
-write letters
-keep sketch books
-make found object sculptures
-find cheap organic food markets
-learn how to budget money
-become a super chef
-drink in moderation
-yoga!
-read more books
-take long walks
-become a museum member
-get dental insurance
-save money for Scotland

Are these things possible?


Cloud Cult came to me in a thought and said
It's beautiful, insatiable, the way our chemicals collide

Feel the Rockstar.

This is what I look like. I've never been a big fan of product placement, but I've found that if they needed a Rockstar spokesperson, I'd be best to fit. I'm usually in tune with collective fashions meshed together into one big mess. I've always been the girl who either knows that an outfit was a hit and that it is photographable at every angle, or the girl who really regrets leaving the house in short skirts with short shirts (tunics save my short skirt's life). I rarely let anyone take my photograph, so most of my photographs are taken myself. I need to meet like minded photographers who know flattering angles for all body types.

Today I went to the beach with Alida. I will have photographs from today up within the next week or two. I stole my father's handy dandy 35mm camera for probably what will be the rest of the summer. So be patient! Photographs soon to come. 35mm cameras compared to digital cameras are what letters are compared to emails.

Tom Waits says

I stumbled in the darkness, lost and alone.

Squibbles and Squabbles.

I thought I would take time to post the essential people in my life at the moment. This is Chelsea. She's been one of those 'through thick and thin' people to me. I have always felt like if there was a battle I would need to go into head first, she would be there next to me fighting to the death.

Her hair isn't always this short. Right now it's darker, with blunt bangs and a slight bob. She always typically wears black, because her job requires it. I've never known anyone to wear just one colour collectively, and make it work. And hey, it could be worse. It could be day glow like our good friend Will Smith circa Fresh Prince of Belair. And we know that he could make it work only because of his ability to dance with pure limbs of glory!

So I scrambled on myspace for a photo, because I realized that all of my photographs taken of Wes were stupidly taken while drunk. I have a knack for documenting friends mid upper lip out, teeth slightly gapped and bottom lip slightly to the left while their eyes have rolled back into their head and their nostrils are flaired. I will snap that one good photo someday, Wes!

I remember once, when Wes had begged Chelsea and I to attend the saloon with him before gay pride weekend. It really put things into perspective for me. I realized that he isn't as gay I make him seem and that he is more attractive than most of the gay community in Minneapolis. Maybe I have a bias, because I am just that good of friends with him. He is one of the best people that I've met. We've coined so many phrases. For example, just to randomly say "Oogen, Boogen" while scooting down Hennepin avenue only means what it is while saying it during that time. And to possibly explain it later, well...it has taken on a new meaning by the time that comes. Wes typically wears nice clothes. Whether it be a nice leather messenger bag as a "must have" accessory or super short shorts from American Apparel. We could stand on a mountain while screaming "Fuck Louis Vuitton, Marc Jacobs please do us in the butt". We both understand the brevity in everything we say. And as a collective of Chelsea, Wes and I...we just make it happen. Simple.

More to come on other friends soon. Because I know you all care so much (and I know there is so many of you reading my blogs.)

The Beatles are saying to me that
I need a fix because I'm going down

Not very modest and living in a dream world.

I have this idea of a sexy runaway brunette.
She wears chunky boots with short black shorts and a worn yellow T-shirt
that she stole from her ex-boyfriend.
She's holding a vintage suitcase full of all her belongings
and she takes one last deep breath before
she jumps on a bus at sunrise.

When Chelsea and I attended Rock the Garden on June 21st of this year
we had come to the conclusion that there were
more cutes dresses than boys.

I can recognize that this is the first of many blogs to come.
And I will only dabble in the past as a reference
to something relevant to the present.
Because starting today is a new life
and I am always the biggest fan
of starting over.

Buddy Holly is telling me that
Well, alright. Well, alright. Our lifetime of love will be all right.